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Conventionally this is thought to be a bloody, messy, painful process, but it really doesn’t have to be.” (Uh, thank God.) Dr. This is a little more cut and dry than what counts as virginity. I know, you’re probably like, “Thanks for nothing, Sager, I need more than that! “You know you’re ready to have sex when you can handle the physical and emotional responsibilities of having sex, meaning that you have been to the doctor and had a physical exam, spoken with them about your desire to have sex, consulted on the best form of birth control, and the best way to avoid STDs.” But wait!

Ask yourself: Do you really want to have sex for the sake of having sex?

If your parents are finally cool with the idea of their little girl getting laid, they may insist on going with you to buy protection. If you fight them on this, they may not think you’re mature enough to have sex in the first place. Zelfand recommends a hypo-allergenic lube to make things more comfortable. or it can be pretty crummy if your partner ends up being a jackass. “Girls need to realize that they only get to give the gift of their virginity once, so they need to make sure that the occasion is special.” What’s more, you may feel pressured to stay with the dude just because you slept with him.

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