No one demonized my grandmother for this, because she was born and raised in a country where 90% of the population was Black.
Here in the United States, yes, we are blessed to have a diverse society with large, vibrant communities of different cultures. 5 years ago, I automatically saw anyone else who was dating interracially as my ally…or at least a kindred spirit. While I’m not sure if this is bred by jealously or insecurity, the end result is ongoing challenges to the integrity of your own relationship. Other Black women who date interracially (including my BF’s ex), seem quick to make judgement calls on the quality of our relationship (in spite of having very limited information available).
But they may feel alienated and not connected to your significant other. Just make sure that your significant other is supporting you unabashedly when their family is in the wrong. You don’t want to end up like that chick that was calling Dr. Shirking away from your lover in public is disrespectful on so many levels! I was tempted to put “The Black Community” there, but these issues are not unique to White/Black couplings.
If this is the case, take the high road and be polite, kind and thoughtful. Sadly, the minority community will label those who date outside of their race as “sellouts”.
Here are ten of them…and this list is far from being exhaustive. When you enter into an interracial relationship, you have the strength, courage, tenacity, and patience to deal with the issues that being in an interracial relationship poses? If you family is accepting, can you deal with the disdain from the public? Do you have it in you to be an “educator” or a “token” of diversity?
In all honesty, some people deal with this splendidly. But you have to know what type of person you are; you have to know what your social limitations are, before you can consider dating interracially. Without a doubt, the impact of family on your relationship has a lot to do with the emotional independence of the couple.
Dating interracially is one of the topics I have no issues talking about.
I love sharing my experiences and opinions with others (hence why I’m a blogger).The downside to that however is people grow to believe that in order to insure the survival of your culture or community, you have to marry only within that particular community. Many websites and blogs that seem to celebrate interracial relationships are really just a front to perpetuate very narrow views on why interracial relationships are “ideal”, “preferred” or “superior”.